This past weekend, was the opening weekend of the deer season here in NY. I, with my gruff bearded face and my trusty muzzle loader snuck silently into the forest just before sunrise. We found a cozy little spot to sit and watch for a yummy white tailed deer. It didn't take long before I somehow became the center of attention where I sat. First let me explain something about the forrest. The animal critters that run and climb and fly about the forrest have their own unique communication system. They talk to each other in a series of squeeks, chirps and clicks, that seem like utter nonsense to the average human. I, in all my years of listening have mastered some of the more subtle vocabulary utterances. For instance, little Tommy, the red squirrel who lives in the second tall spruce tree next to the fallen poplar just east of the pond, he came down from his tree and spotted me sitting there on the ground. (true story) So, Tommy chatters at me, something about "Who are you and what are you doing here?" Not wanting to be rude I replied "Squeek, chirp chirp chirp chatter chatter squeek." Tommy then scurried about the tree looking for his friend Albert. Albert lives across the firebreak in the fifth Scotch Pine down from the shooting lane. Albert wasn't up yet, so Tommy called him with a very loud chatter. eventually Albert answered Tommy and the two of them chatted about the weather and the diminishing supply of pine cones to be found. I asked Tommy "Chirp chirp chirp?" He came down the tree and stood on the lowest branch and made a rude and obscene gesture at me. Red squirrels are quite often known for this, so I didn't let it bother me. I made a rude and obscene gesture back, just to let him know we were friends. Tommy and I were having a pleasant conversation when Tommy suddenly became distracted. Obviously someone else had entered into the little clearing in which I sat. Tommy skittered about up the tree a couple of feet and said, "Elaina! What brings you by so early in the morning? I heard a soft voice behind me and turned very slowly to see a white tailed deer standing perhaps 50 feet from the tree. Elaina and Tommy talked a bit and I just sat and listened. Eventually Elaina smelled me and sneezed 3 times, to which I replied "Click click click" She quickly jumped back and asked, "Who is that?" to which Tommy replied, "Oh that is just John. He is hunting deer." Elaina exclaimed, "I am a deer!" I whispered to Tommy, "Shhhh, click, squeek, chatter chatter chatter," and he did. Then Elaina trotted away muttering something about bleeping hunters and their bleeping guns. After a while Tommy went off to find some breakfast. He returned to the top of the tree with a pine cone and proceed to eat, dropping bits and pieces of scrap on my head. He is such a sloppy eater. The day went by mostly uneventful, until later in the afternoon. I was walking out to the road when I saw her laying there. She was motionless and still. I carefully approached, and it became painfully clear that she was dead. Another hunter shot Elaina, later in the morning. She came back to the spruces and lay down beside the stream and died. I don't know what came over me, but all I could think about was, putting some meat in my freezer. So I gutted her, I tagged her and then I dragged her back to camp. For the first time in my hunting career I took a deer without even firing a shot. It was sad to see Elaina pass, and I will remember her every time we have one of her steaks for dinner. | 
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